The Retired Menace
Probably right. Possibly high.
Retired veteran menace. Still taking notes.
Satire, travel scars, shipwreck detours, civic side-eye, and the occasional useful conclusion dragged out of the smoke.
Latest Dispatch
1. Vancouver Man Steals Ferry… Immediately Crashes It Pirates Of The Pacific Northwest A man reportedly stole a small ferry vessel in B.C. and managed to crash it almost immediately after taking off.
Read the dispatchOutrage Brief
Canada continues producing headlines that sound like rejected South Park episodes. Here’s the newest batch of national nonsense you can weaponize
Canada has now fully evolved into: a country where the wildlife is armed, the coffee is suspicious, and nobody asks follow-up questions
🍔🦅 THE RETIRED MENACE PRESENTS: MAKE ARCHES GREAT AGAIN Donald Trump says America needs more monuments. Buddy already lives like a divorced Caesar
Internet Lost Its Mind
🧨 Today in “This Can’t Be Real — But It Is” — Canada Edition A Saskatchewan man got fined after attempting to “test” whether his riding lawnmower could
A bear broke into a BC family’s minivan… …and ate 69 cans of soda. Not food. Not camping supplies. Just absolutely housing carbonated beverages like
Old Scars
A bear broke into a BC family’s minivan… …and ate 69 cans of soda. Not food. Not camping supplies. Just absolutely housing carbonated beverages like a divorced uncle at a fishing derby. Conservation officers arrived
Open the scar tissue
Travel / Shipwrecks
🍔🦅 THE RETIRED MENACE PRESENTS: MAKE ARCHES GREAT AGAIN Donald Trump says America needs more monuments. Buddy already lives like a divorced Caesar wearing bronzer and eating Filet-O-Fish at 2AM. So naturally, the only logical
Read the field noteMenace Supply
Quiet logo. Loud internal monologue.
For looking harmless while noticing everything.
The field version. Sweat, shade, and bad decisions nearby.