🧨 Today in “This Can’t Be Real — But It Is” — Canada Edition

A man in Alberta got arrested after allegedly trying to steal a skid steer from a construction site… …while already driving a stolen skid steer. Buddy was essentially running a heavy-equipment carpool for crime. Police said he “attempted to flee.” On a skid steer. Nothing says Canadian criminal mastermind like

🧨 Today in “This Can’t Be Real — But It Is” — Canada Edition

A man in Alberta got arrested after allegedly trying to steal a skid steer from a construction site…

…while already driving a stolen skid steer.

Buddy was essentially running a heavy-equipment carpool for crime.

Police said he “attempted to flee.”
On a skid steer.

Nothing says Canadian criminal mastermind like escaping at the top speed of an aggressively motivated lawn chair.

The RCMP pursuit probably looked like:

“Dispatch, suspect is heading northbound at approximately… 11 km/h.”

“Copy that. Should we deploy spike strips?”

“Negative. Frank from Tim Hortons is walking faster.”

Meanwhile somewhere in rural Alberta, three dads watching this on Facebook Live immediately said:

“Honestly? Pretty decent bucket control though.”

This is why Canadians can’t have organized crime.
Every criminal enterprise eventually turns into:

  1. A marketplace dispute
  2. A misunderstanding about trailer ownership
  3. Somebody’s cousin Trevor welding something illegal after six beers

And the skid steer itself?
Probably worth more than the average Toronto condo parking spot.

🇨🇦 Only in Canada can a police chase double as municipal snow-clearing equipment.